I Am In Japan, And You Told Me I Would Melt, Which I Didn't. LIES!!!

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And you people said I would! Me? Melt? I think not.

You people should know that YOU CAN visit Japan!  They WANT people to visit.  They have an economy TOO, YOU KNOW, and they don't want it destroyed by senseless RUMORS of people who are to afraid to help others in a country who needs help!  Yes, they need help, and that means YOU.  DONATE ! VISIT! GO TO JAPAN!!

Nothing’s gonna derail the RTW Train…. Except for maybe a chocolate shake. A good one though, not one of those crappy ones that Tanzania claims is a shake.

(P.S – DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT get a chocolate shake ANYWHERE in Tanzania. Why? Because it tastes like milk that they kinda swished some cocoa powder around in. It is not to die for, whatever they tell you)

You know what I want? I Frappe. I chocolate Frappe. Those are tasty. It’s basically just a really think shake. Which makes it double the yumminess.

Wait…. How did this get from me telling you about Japan, to me talking about how much I miss Frappes? Yeesh. Back to the topic at hand.

ANYWAY. The only thing I probably have to worry about in Japan is how big it is and how easily I get lost. To get from point A to point B, you have to take the rail, then the subway, then a taxi and maybe another subway. It gets kind of annoying, especially because there’s so much to see, and so little time. While I’m hobbling around the subway, I’m thinking about how great a magic portal would be, so I wouldn’t have to put my brain into overdrive trying to think about which rail is which.

There are people in need, there is a disaster to deal with, but the whole country is not covered with a cloud of toxic radiation that some people kept talking about. They measured the radiation in the water again, and again, it showed ZERO radiation.  The ground is not melting underneath me, and there doesn’t seem to be a gigantic wall of water headed towards me.

But you know what REALLY ticks me off? Well, there are these pills, and they block a certain type of radiation. Now, instead of people in Japan getting them because they’re cautious and don’t like the thought of rays of poison hurting them, PEOPLE IN AMERICA BOUGHT ALL of the pills! Just in case a FREAK STRAND OF RADIATION hit them!

To those of you who bought the pills, unless you doctor prescribed them, SERIOUSLY?! We have virtually NO radiation in America if ANY. Why in the world do you need radiation pills? Don’t you think the people in Japan would have better use for them? You know, like healing the sick?

But no. Just to be ‘safe’ you guys took all the pills.

You’re ridiculous on at least ten levels.

So, now that that’s over with, I will explain how much we had to travel to get from point A to point B. Ready? GO!

We took a plane from South Korea to Japan, the plane was technically just stopping in Japan. The next place it was headed for was CHICAGO and then, just guess where it was headed. I don’t think you’ll get it :P


If I stayed on that plane for just THREE stops, I could’ve been home right now XD

This was my plan:  “Ok… arrive in Japan. Once the authority people tell me to get off, hide UNDERNEATH the seat. When next person comes to claim their seat, give them the universal ‘SHHHHHHH’ sign. If they proceed to tell the flight attendant that there appears to be a gremlin underneath their seat, I’ll jab them in the leg. That should shut them up. Conversation for snacks:

Me: hey! Gimme your ham sandwich!

Person: NO! I let you stay on the plane, I WILL NOT give you my food!

Me: Sure about that?

Person: Positively.


Person: Ok, ok. I’ll give you the sandwich…. *frowns in my general direction*

Me: Thank you.

Flight Attendant: Hello sir. Would you like anything to drink?

Person: Yes, I’ll have a coffee please.

Me: *jabs in leg* coke, COKE!

Person: OW! Ok! A COKE!!

Flight Attendant: Uhh… ok, Coke it is…..



Flight Attendant: No need to yell….? *What’s this guys problem?*

And then I’m underneath the seat, happily sipping my Mountain Dew and Coke. The person above me has eaten nothing and he is parched. Sorry? I regret NOTHING :P”

Anyway, my plan was crushed because A) I really can’t fit under the seat and B) The flight attendant was looking at me like I was planning to do exactly that, and was also ready to say “Come on kid, get off the plane.”

So once I scrambled off the plane, we had to take a rail, then a subway, then another sub way. The last subway was a ‘Woman Only’ car, but we got Alex on anyway. I laughed.

So once we got off that Subway, the Hostel was only like 1/8 of a mile away. Which isn’t far if you think that’s what I’m getting at. We arrived in Japan at 2:00pm.  and got to our Hostel at 5:00pm.

You can see why I’m annoyed, can you not?

This post was basically to commemorate that I have not melted when half the people I knew told me to cut the trip short and skip Japan because I most definitely would melt.

I haven’t.

I win.

Next time I see any of you, you owe me a box of Cheese-Itz.

I love them and they have them nowhere else on the planet except America.

Pronounced ‘UH-Mur-ick-A’

Not ‘America’

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Posted on: May 20, 2011 | Categories: Environment, History, Snacks and Food




I win

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